Big Bang Thoughts

[debbiel66]

Hey... here I am making my 2nd non-fic LJ post ever, and I really have no idea why. It's just that I've been fully immersed in my Big Bang for the past six or so weeks, and all of a sudden, I realized I'm close to the end of it, and it's kinda sad...



It's a weird feeling. I've got over 27,000 words written, probably have another 5,000 to go, and I'm already feeling a little bereft. Is this normal? I always feel a little sad after a story is written, but I've been finding myself stalling for the past couple days. I could probably sit down and finish this thing today, but I'm just not sure I want to.

Maybe because I usually write shorter stories, but I just don't want to let this one go, even though there's a looming May 1st deadline and the rest of my April is so busy. I just feel like I've bonded with this one - it's been one of those very rare stories that has given me so little grief. Apart from a two day bout of writer's block, it's pretty much written itself, and maybe because I know how rare that it, I am reluctant to let it go.

I always have the niggling worry when I'm writing... that maybe this will be it. Maybe I'll never have another story idea, maybe I'll never have another conversation that writes itself, maybe I'll never be able to imagine a scene fully enough that I want to write it down. Maybe, this will be the last story that comes easy, and so on and on and on it goes.

I've been doing this all morning, while I sit here not writing the last section of this story. Sigh.

But coffee makes up for a world of woe, so I shall drink some more and get back to hedging and stalling a little more. :)

Comments

[strangeandcharm.livejournal.com]

I knew! It was a mission, but somehow it all came together at the end. And I'm very proud of it, thankfully!

Controlling anything over 10,000 words can be tough. Just be strict, I guess, and don't meander too much. Although your fics are always fab so I doubt you need any advice from me! What's this one about?

[debbiel66.livejournal.com]

Meandering is the thing I'm worried about. I usually have the problem of over-editing. I'll write something and edit out a third of it - I've always been that way. Less is more, that sort of thing. With this one, I keep finding these extra little scenes, and I don't know if I'm stalling. It's weird because I never go off the plan like this.

The story came from Roque Clasique's bday meme: What if John is the one who goes to Stanford to get Sam, and Dean is the one who is missing...? It's turned into an AU for the pilot/Season 1.

Turns out that I really love Season 1 boys, so that's probably contributing to my reluctance to finish up as well. Thanks so much for the encouragement - I've never done a challenge before and all advice is gratefully appreciated!

[jenilees.livejournal.com]

Ok I'm sorry, I'm butting into this post too but I was reading what your bbang is about and this just intrigues me so much. The John and Sam dynamic is something we rarely see and especially when feelings and emotions are at their rawest between these two. I mean there is lots after they've come to terms with each other because of the demon but not much before Jess or even directly after. I am really looking forward to this even more so now.

[debbiel66.livejournal.com]

I have adored writing John in this. My reaction toward him varies wildly, depending on which POV I'm in, but it's something I so desperately wish we'd have had more of on the show. It's part of the reason I'm reluctant to finish this story. :)